I desire mercy

Decent people did not associate with tax collectors and sinners, so when they joined Jesus for a meal, the pharisees were shocked, asked his disciples why. Jesus’ answer challenged their perception, saying that it was these people Jesus had come for, not the righteous. Go and learn what this means, he told them, I desire mercy, not sacrifice (Matthew 9:9-13). But I wonder how much we need to hear the same words today. It is so easy to pass over these parts of the Gospels. We no longer follow a sacrificial system of worship, and we all know that we’re sinners, so of course we do not exclude people. Do we? But, if we’re honest, don’t we often operate just as the pharisees used to? We may not sacrifice animals, but we have our own rituals. Do we prioritise those over mercy? Do we still treat people as though they were tax collectors and sinners, even if we call it a different name? People who, for whatever reason, are beyond the pale, sinners, not acceptable. Or at least, not acceptable unless they meet our own standard of behaviour, a standard which we may or may not meet ourselves, and which may or may not reflect what God wants. Except we are told in this passage exactly what God wants: I desire mercy. How often do we fall short of that, under some pretext or other?

I am not talking about discipline, or how that is done, which is a necessary part of church life. I am talking about the way we as individuals relate to others, and the way the church relates to various groups, which it may (or may not) label ‘sinful’.  Which individuals and groups those are is probably best left for further contemplation, as is how we respond once we come to that realisation. But it is a vital part of our awareness, if we are not to exclude people from the church, either deliberately or otherwise, because in excluding them from the church we risk excluding them from God. Thankfully, God is wider than our own human-imposed limits, and can work beyond them.

The question arises as to why we are unmerciful? Having had experience of God’s overwhelming mercy and compassion towards ourselves, why are we not inspired to extend that to others? Could it be that our own knowledge of God’s mercy is limited? That we may be judging ourselves as badly as we judge other people? That we may be so stubbornly independent that we cannot experience God’s mercy, in our determination to ‘do it myself’? That we do not see ourselves as sinners in need of mercy, however much we pay lip service to that fact?  That we do not trust God’s mercy, so need to exclude others in order to belong ourselves? That our faith is less entwined in our daily life, but something we shunt off into a corner so it does not affect how we live? Could it be that our pride prevents us from truly experiencing God’s mercy?

For mercy implies dependence; it implies we have got it wrong; it means we need to acknowledge to ourselves, and others, how far we have messed up, and allow God’s forgiveness into that; it means we have to let go of our internal self- judgement and allow the fact that God loves us to penetrate. All that involves change, and change in which we are not in control. We have to let go of the independent pride that says I will do this myself; we have to let go of the superficial pride which tells us we are good people; we have to let go of that subtle under-turning of pride which condemns ourselves and tells us we are no good. It means letting go and allowing God in to the most vulnerable places within ourselves. Having done that, who knows where we will go?

Mercy is at the core of our faith. We are sinners who have messed up, but we also have a God who loves us and longs to forgive us. I think that to truly know God’s mercy, we need to accept it. The forgiveness may be there anyway, but we need to turn to God, acknowledge that we have messed up, and allow the Spirit to work within us, the Spirit of mercy and compassion. We need to keep doing this; once will not stop us sinning, and it will not stop us from judging others. But I think that we can be sure that if we are judging others, then we need to learn what it means when God says I desire mercy not sacrifice, and that the learning will begin with us. To truly learn, to truly experience God’s mercy, we need to allow that learning to spill over into how we relate to other people. It is only what we pray regularly in the Lord’s prayer: forgive us our sins as we forgive those who have sinned against us. If we were totally aware of the glorious extent of God’s merciful compassion towards us, could we really exclude people from that? But do we?